Sunday, October 14, 2007

The sadness in her eyes.....

I was at my sons football game yesterday.... (Yes, I plan on putting some pictures up). And one of the moms started talking with me. I introduced myself to her and shook her hand. She seemed nice enough. But as soon as she started talking, I could smell all this alcohol coming from her. Then she began commenting on how my little girl was soo pretty and how her little girl was... Let's see, her exact words were "the devil". OMG, I was shocked to hear any mother say that their child was the devil.

I understand that we all get frustrated and that our kids learn to push our buttons. And I even know that we allow it. Well, I do. And I also know that my daughter IS very hard. She is set in her way. She will do things her way, even if it's wrong, not wanting any help. I've told my friends how she is. But I have not said any of this in front of her. I could not imagine saying such hurtful things to my children.

Well, as we were leaving, this lady came up to me with her little daughter. She had to be about 7 or 8 years old. She turned to look at me and the mother introduced her daughter to me as her "little devil". And then started telling me how she does not listen and disobeys her and that she was the perfect child, then saying that she could only wish. I stood there watching this little girl, looking at her mom, with such sadness. The little girl did not say anything. Not a word. She was just looking up at her mom, as if wondering why her mom did not love her. She had such sadness in her eyes. I can't explain it.

I did not know what to say or do... How to react. I just walked to the girl and put my arms around her and rubbing her back, looking at the mother and telling her that she had a beautiful little girl who will be just fine.

Obviously this bothers me. I am still thinking about it today. And I wish I had said different things to the mother. I really wanted to shake the mother and ask her if she really could not see what she was doing to her daughter? But I didn't. I really wanted to hug that little girl, not just rub her back. And tell her that she is perfect the way she is. But I didn't.

I am not the perfect mom. I make alot of mistakes. But I have a great relationship with my son As far as him telling me things. He is always talking with me about things that he does not want this person to know or that person to know. I want him to be able to come to me with anything and I want him to know it's ok. Lately he has been going through this mouthy thing. But I remember it. I used to do it. Anything I ask him is "in a minute" or "not just yet". The only real complaint I have about my son is all this football and wrestling stuff he takes out on his sister. Now, she is growing into a mini wrestler/football player.

My children are blessings. I may not feel that or think that every day but I do know. I am lucky to have my kids. And it is because of them that I strive for so much more. That I check myself to make sure that I am giving them My attention.... My heart.... My positive words... My unconditional love.

To all the little boys and girls that have looked up to their mother or father and been spoken down to as if they were no good..... As the tears roll down my cheeks , I give you all a hug from me. Someone you don't even know does care about you and how you feel.


Faithful Grannie said...

GOOD For you Cindy... You are correct there are so many children out there that desire attention and love from their parents. The one thing you can do each and every day is tell a child how fantasic and wonderful they are and mostly I LOVE YOU!!

Cindy Ashworth said...

Thank you. I don't know what happnened to me at that moment but all I can say is that I was realy sad for that little girl and I feel like I should have handled things differntly, but I did not. I think I have encountered a learning experience.... Next time I see something like this, I WILL say something.