Awww..I don't know what to do....

Ok...so, I have a situation that I don't know how to handle. If only this was about business... I know that inside and out.

This involves family... Family that I choose to have no contact with. All I can say is that for all the people out there that have close ties to their family, their parents, siblings and cousins.... I so envy that.

But some of us end up in situations where we have to choose between sanity and family connections. And that's what I had to do. After the birth of my son, I knew I had to choose sanity.....I only wanted the best for my boy....And honestly, in my situation it was not a hard choice to make considering the upbringing that I had.

So I cut off all ties to family accept to those that were of no harm to me or my family... That being my brother and my Grandmother....Which I love so deeply.

So now I have recently come across my sister....She of course has a blog out there and I stumbled on it... My brother tells me that she is a lost soul....Into a lot of trouble and stuff....But the BIG sister in me kicks in and I want to know how she is....(she lost a baby, my niece, awhile back).......Yet I am scared to let her in because I don't want her to take advantage of me or my kids.... I don't want to get close again and end up with no sister... Which is what happened before.

Yes, I could sit here and tell the (poor is me stories) of how I not only took care of my brother and sister while we were growing up... But I also had to gain custody of them. And then I found myself in a position where I had to choose between my brother or my husband.... And I chose my brother....Which helped to end my marriage....

I tried so hard with my sister to keep her on the right track yet she ventured off down the wrong road....I lost contact with her after that....I had a son and had to put him first, along with my sanity.

Here I am, giving the opportunity to reach out to my sister....My blood... Who seems to still be a lost soul, yet the sisterliness in me wants to reach out to her.... I just don't know what to do.

If she is mixed up in drugs or things of that nature... I don't want anything to do with her...Yet a part of me understands the grief she must feel with the loss of her little girl (my niece).... And I am her sister, after all....

As my children get older, I can only be grateful for the family that they do have and hope they understand why I have to keep my distance from my family....

Any suggestions would be appreciated.