Thursday, June 21, 2007

No Shrek ?

So, it's been a little while. Let me back up to the Friday when we were going to go and see Shrek at the movies with my kids. Shrek was on the screen the day before, but when we got there, it was off..... I was kind of looking forward to it too.... LOL We ended up seeing " Surfs Up" and " Spiderman 3". Spiderman rocked !!! My kids were asleep during the middle of the first movie. LOL. So Jeff stayed over for a bit and we just hung out talking and stuff... Getting to know each other a little better.

The following week I felt myself slipping from my business. I had to check myself and put myself back in place. See how easy it is to meet someone and get all distracted. You get so all caught up in something new that the dream you have, the goal that you have can become "not as important". I don't want that to happen. I am sooo determined and focused. I know where I will be and what I want and what I need to do in order to get there. I can't afford to get side-stepped.

I find myself questioning any man that I begin to see. Well, I don't question him... I just question the situation, the relationship... Whatever it may be. I am a mom... I have kids. I don't bring men over to meet my kids often. I have alot of male friends and I don't have a problem having them over because it's not a potential relationship. There is nothing to lose. They are my friends. But to bring a man over that I am seeing to meet my kids is a really big step.

The last person I dated was Jason. I met Jason at my full time job. We have alot in common. Especially our sense of humor. LOL For anyone that knows Opie and Anthony or Rover Morning Glory..... That's me.... Yet, we were different in alot of things as well.

Jason is a great guy. He has alot to offer any woman. He has a good head on his shoulders... Has a good relationship with his parents.... Is very versatile.... Likes everything. I have never been to the theatre... Well, I took my son to see Spiderman live... LOL And Barney..... But I don't think that counts...... LMAO But Jason took me to see "Wicked"...... The best show I ever seen. WOW ! And the most important thing to me is how a man interacts with my kids. Are they faking it or do they really like my kids and do my kids really like them ? With Jason, he really liked my kids. And they really liked him.

Now, we are still friends. We see each other every day. I still would like to invite him over to just chill out and watch one of his strange movies that he likes.... LOL. But can you really be friends after dating?
Our personalities clash at times.... But don't all friends? So, why am I not with Jason?, You may ask..... It's like this. My baby days are done. I have two great kids. A boy and a girl. I am lucky and I know it. But, I am not having any more.....Jason is a little younger than me and I look at it like this......... He would be such a great husband, family man, dad...And by being with me, he will miss out on the parenting experience.... Being in the delivery room, watching his own child grow up.....I can't take that beautiful experience away from him. And I won't ! Plus, I don't see myself getting married again. This time around it WILL be my way or no way !!! So for now, I will remain friends with him for as long as he will have me.... I value his friendship more than he knows.

So about Jeff, I don't know. That's it..... I just don't know. So I will sit back and let things come as they will and take it from there. And follow my heart along the way.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Not sure what is happening or how it happened. Thought I was giving you plenty of room. I will place the ball entirely in your court. When or if we talk or possibly do anything will be up to you so this way you can have as much room as you wish. Not sure what else to do.